An excerpt From “The four agreements” : Accept who we are

[…]That is why human resist life. To be alive is the biggest fear humans have. Death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive – the risk to be alive and express what we really are. Just being ourselves is the biggest fear of humans. We have learned to live by others people’s point of view because of the fear of not being accepted and of not being good enough for someone else

During the process of domestication, we form an image of what perfection is in order to try to be good enough. We create an image of what perfection is in order to try to be good enough. We create an image of how we should be in order to be accepted by everybody. We especially try to please the ones who love us like Mom and Dad, big brothers and sisters, the priests and the teacher. Trying to be good enough for them, we create an image of perfection, but we don’t fit this image. We create this image, but this image is not real. We are never going to be perfect from this point of view. Never!

Not being perfect, we reject ourselves, but the level of self-rejection depends upon how effective the adults were in breaking our integrity…

We have the need to be accepted and to be loved by others, but we cannot accept and love ourselves. The more self-love  we have, the less we will experience self-abuse. Self-abuse comes from self-rejection, and self-rejection comes from having an image of what it means to be perfect and never measuring up to that ideal. Our image of perfection is the reason we reject oursleves; it is why we don’t accept oursleves the way we are, and why we don’t accept others the way they are.

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